Angry Doctor

Friday, September 09, 2005

Skin is thicker than blood

Dengue Season means more demand for platelet transfusions in the hospitals, so do lend a helping hand (and arm) at the Blood Bank if you can.

This story is dedicated to all the housemen who managed to squeeze blood from stones.

BTS: Hello? You paged?

What I say: Hi, this is angry doc, calling from Cheap Good Hospital. I’ve got a patient with a bleeding ulcer and I need some packed cells.

BTS: OK… what’s his Hb?

What I want to say: Well, it’s probably 8 now, but before the last two packs it was…

What I say: 6.4.

BTS: Hmm… what’s his blood group.

What I say: B+

BTS: Hmm… we are short of B+ now. How many units do you need?

What I want to say: You know, I swear this job can be done by a recording. He needs two units actually, but since I know what you are going to say…

What I say: Four.

BTS: Hmm... cannot lah; I can only give you one.

What I want to say: Yikes! You’re even stingier than I thought.

What I say: But he’s still bleeding… can you approve another unit please?

BTS: No. We’re really very short on B+ now.

What I want to say: OK, I didn’t think I would have to sink so low, but…

What I say: C’mon. I can tell from your voice you are a kind doctor, right? What’s your name?

BTS: Charity*. What’s yours?

What I want to say: …

What I say: Irony…

BTS: Irony?

What I say: Er… Ernie. That’s right… Ernie.

BTS: Ernie? You went to med school with my sister, right?

What I want to say: Well, I slept through most of med school and don’t remember much, but if it’ll help…

What I say: Yes! I bet you are as sweet and pretty as your sister.

BTS: *giggle* Well, let your blood bank know I’ve approved two units.

What I want to say: I feel so dirty… but…

What I say: Thanks.

* - Apologies to the real Dr Charity. Now who can tell me what Charity’s sister’s name is?

5 Comments:

  • Haha!

    Yeah man. Whoever tells the truth to the BTS MO and cannot get blood next morning get tekkaned big time by the MO or Reg!

    Is this in the HO survival guide?

    It should be included. I remember I used to get screwed all the time (I am an honest guy) and I never knew how the MOs could always get the blood.

    Nice guys finish last.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, At September 09, 2005 5:57 pm  

  • ermmmmmm.... elephant?? charity elephant right???? or sharity????

    By Anonymous yl, At September 09, 2005 8:47 pm  

  • I know! The sisters of Charity are Faith and Hope - if you're referring to Dawn (the comic series by Michael Linsner).

    And you're kidding me that you managed to squeeze blood from stone that way right?

    And I'm not quite sure why some BTS MO's ask for name and IC but other times they don't? Is it dependent on supply?

    By Anonymous Dr Quack, At September 10, 2005 2:58 pm  

  • Hey, read the disclaimer, man. :)

    Remember those times when your consultant would ask you to get blood just to top up Hb for an elective op rather than let medical work out the anaemia?

    *sigh*

    Not sure why BTS MO sometimes ask for IC. Probably to make sure some other HO doesn't hijack your issue.

    The real Charity had a sister, also a doctor, named Faith. Not sure if there's Hope.(heheh)

    By Blogger angry doc, At September 10, 2005 3:09 pm  

  • I always tell the truth to the BTS MO. Then again, I can afford this luxury of conscience, since I won't get tekaned by anyone. ;)

    By Anonymous Anonymous, At September 13, 2005 10:35 pm  

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