Angry Doctor

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Goldilocks and the Three Chairs


(image from http://www.ndaga.org/index.html)


Goldilocks survived her encounter with the three bears and lived to a ripe old age, when she became plagued with rheumatism of her left knee.

Unable to bear the pain, she decided to see a healer.

She walked into the woods with the aid of her cane, and pretty soon she came upon a house of healers.

The first healer, a shaman, invited her to sit on a yellow chair, its back carved in the shape of a totem bird, saying to her:

"Your pain is due to a demon which is living in your knee, and I shall rid you of the pain by sticking these needles into your leg, piercing the demon and driving it away."

The second healer, an acupuncturist, invited her to sit on a red chair, its back carved in the form of the element Fire, saying to her:

"Your pain is due to qi stagnation caused by excessive dampness, and I shall rid you of the pain by sticking these needles into your leg, unblocking the qi."

The third healer, an anaesthetist, invited her to sit on a black chair, its back carved in a geometric, sterile shape, saying to her:

"Your pain is due to chemicals released during inflammation, and I shall rid you of the pain by sticking these needles into your leg, which will stimulate the release of chemicals which will relieve the pain."

Which chair, O gentle reader! should Goldilocks choose?

Labels:

4 Comments:

  • since they're all the same, the cheapest one of course. ;)

    By Blogger Sillyporean, At November 13, 2007 5:17 pm  

  • that's funny :) knee pain how to sit on chair..-LH

    By Anonymous Anonymous, At November 13, 2007 5:42 pm  

  • In Goldilocks' world, bears talk.

    I'd say that in Goldilocks' world, science is the equivalent to our magic and fantasy.

    So most likely Goldilocks would choose the Shaman.

    By Blogger Dr Oz bloke, At November 14, 2007 10:21 am  

  • Oh, for suck's fake, not that cursed Goldilocks again! Oh Death, where is thy sting?

    I pray she tries all 3 chairs, has 3 long blunt needles stuck where it really hurts, and gets royally ripped off by all 3 quacks.

    - Baby Bear*


    * Yes, that's right, I'm still damned pissed that she ate ALL my bloody porridge, BROKE my frickin' chair and DROOLED in my goddamned bed WITHOUT my permission, the cupid stunt! Grrr.

    By Anonymous g_e, At November 14, 2007 11:39 pm  

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]



Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home